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Burning Persona (Washed Ashore)

by Amethyst Midnight

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about

An experimental spoken word piece

lyrics

I am burning by this Light
Searching for a way out
But the harder I search
The more blinding the Path becomes.

I went wandering off
As they screamed my name
But I had long forgotten that persona.
Now I am lost.

What more is there to lose
When I've faced the blackthorn crucifixion
a thousand times?
Still unable to remember the lessons.
Plagued with ancient amnesia.

For when I see red
All I hear is screaming
Echoing Shadows haunted my mind.
Your wary eyes pulling me into shame
As I trip in my dance and fall on my face.

Bloody and Bruised. Because of you
(I think?)
For trying to impress
For trying to get you to see me.

As much as you believe you've seen me
The truth is that I'm very far detached
From the persona you've grown to know.
I wish to watch it burn in this Blinding Light
I wish to suffocate each breath of this body
Until all goes numb, but will I remember?

I'm sick of going back
Of returning
To this miserable cage of lessons.
I am not an animal to be forced into submission.
I am burning with rage
I am burning my Ego
And she isn't happy.
I can feel her kicking and screaming.
Never to go down without a fight.
(Irony?)

I wonder if I gave this persona up
If you'd let me go.
I wonder if I admitted my soul was tired,
That solitude was needed,
You'd leave in peace.
But a piece of me knows
I'll never be the same again
If I choose to smash this glass art to shards.

I am shameful of my wandering path
Because no one could understand truly
For my eyes are my own
And isn't it selfish to demand the same sight from others?

I am a selfish bag of flesh here in this realm.
If I chose to hide away
Could I save the world from the likes of me?
Or would that too be a futile attempt?
Would you look at me in pity?

How do I admit I wanted your support from the beginning
But now I wish not even a glance my way.
Shame.

My heart is black.
These flames have charred it to a new state.
I can't say I'm sorry
Words always stuck on repeat.

Should I just fade into the Night
And leave you in the Day?
Because my Mind can no longer
Find reasons for wanting to stay...

credits

released November 7, 2019

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Amethyst Midnight image

Amethyst Midnight Richmond, Virginia

Nothing but stardust manifesting strange wonder. Experimental artist. Cosmic Witch. Shadow Caster. Eclectic Pagan.

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